I Can't Look Season:0 Ep:4
by Lina Cross
Summary: The Wraith modify their stun-guns to give the victim overly aggressive personalities. No one notices the effects until too late, and then Atlantis is taken over. Lieutenant Cooper is the only one left, and without any visible help, she turns to Atlantis as a sentient being.
1. Chapter 1

"Sir, let go of your weapon."

Sheppard smirked at her, although it was cold. Ice cold. It had none of his usual warmth, but all of his arrogance. "Are you giving orders to your CO, Lieutenant?"

Her hand didn't shake, which was probably the only bright side. "My CO has been compromised, so yes. Now _put down your weapon_."

"Compromised?" He fired and she dodged, just barely, but her concentration was broken. He had her pinned to the wall, his forearm digging into her windpipe. "I think the word you're looking for is _improved_."

"Sir, if you're in there," she gasped, "don't do this. Please, don't."

He grabbed hold of her vest and she went flying across the room, her head knocking into the floor. Her sidearm was skidding the other way, completely useless for now. Then his knee was on her chest and there was a knife at her throat.

"Scared, Lieutenant?" he asked, nose inches from hers.

"No," she replied even as tears stung her eyes. The knife was new. She hadn't been expecting that. "Aren't you gonna shoot me like everyone else, sir?"

"No. You're way too much damn trouble. The Wraith'll like it better if I just kill you now."

"They won't, you know," she said, thinking of any way to get herself out of this. "You'll have cheated them out of a meal."

"What's one in thousands?"

She pulled a knife from her own boot and sliced it into the colonel's thigh. Blood spilled onto her vest, but he backed off, screaming in rage. It was time to go, before he killed her.

**. . .**

Weeks ago. She'd given a warning _weeks_ in advance, and they still couldn't prepare.

"Dr. Weir, I need to talk to you," Lieutenant Cooper said, following the scientist through the control room.

"Walk and talk, Lieutenant, I have a lot to do," she said.

"We haven't had serious dealings with the Wraith in weeks."

"Yes, I know. That's good, isn't it?"

"No, Doctor." Cooper stood in her office doorway, almost as though she was blocking the exit. "It's _not_ good. This is _bad_."

"How do you figure?" Elizabeth asked with a curious look at the soldier. After being taken hostage with her for over a day, Elizabeth had learned that Cooper's intentions were only ever for the good of the people, and that she didn't overreact.

"We have them running scared. Do you have any idea what happens when you back powerful people into a corner? How many times have we been backed into a corner, and look what we've done." She stepped further into the room, more confident now that Weir had sat down. "They have technology that surpasses our own. They might just take a leaf out of our book and start coming up with something big."

"Big how?" Elizabeth asked.

"I don't know, I-" She put her hands on the desk, face earnest. "Look, we pull a knife, they pull a gun. We get a tank, they get a hundred nukes that will wipe us off the face of the planet. The hard part is that we don't know what form those nukes will take, but we need to be ready when they come, because I think it's going to be soon."

Elizabeth studied her for a moment, then nodded slowly. "Alright, Lieutenant. There's not a lot we can do, but I'll make sure we're as prepared as possible for whatever happens."

She nodded. "Thank you, Dr. Weir."


	2. Chapter 2

Days. Four days without real human contact. Three days with minimal power. Two whole days with a hole in her arm.

Cooper could finally sympathize with Ronon. Running sucked.

She was in one of the lower levels of the city, re-wrapping her arm in the dark. The wound had started bleeding again, which wasn't a good sign. Her P-90 sat at her side, hardly used. A Wraith stunner rested in her leg holster, in bad need of a new clip. Her knife had been lost in the altercation with Sheppard.

She was exhausted, starving, and damn, she was freezing, but the power had to stay off. The main power, anyway. Doors would still open and close even if the transporters didn't work. Some computers still worked, but they were few and far between. She didn't know the exact science of it, that was Rodney's area, and Rodney was...

She got to her feet, leaving her hiding place to find a new one. No amount of rest was going to help her now, she was too wired, too afraid. A scratch on her collar bone pulled as she moved, but it wasn't serious, so she ignored it.

As much as she didn't want to think about it, her mind kept wandering to who was the worst. It was hard to pick. Teyla or Ronon, probably, if she was going for level of difficulty. Sheppard if she was thinking in terms of emotional trauma. McKay, well... he hadn't even made the long list. He was the whole reason she disabled the power, though, so he was at least a threat.

_"Cooper."_

She flinched, flattening against the wall even though there was no one around. It was her radio. Why she hadn't ditched it, she still didn't know.

_"I know you can hear me, Lieutenant. I want you to know that I forgive you for that little scratch you gave me. It's healing up nicely, so no harm, no foul, right?" _

She didn't reply, wouldn't reply. It would be too easy for him to get to her if she started talking back. _Not Sheppard, not Sheppard, it's not Sheppard._

_"Just come to the control room. I promise, I won't try to kill you this time. My word means everything to you, doesn't it?"_

The reason she kept the radio was to hear his voice. Just in case it wore off, in case he was better, he could come find her. She knew he wasn't better, but still felt like she needed to know he was alive. But this wasn't Sheppard, and his words now didn't count for anything.

_"You were my favorite, you know? I know everyone likes to think I'm madly in love with Teyla or Elizabeth, but it wouldn't work. But you, you're tough, Lieutenant. I think you should come to the control room. We'll work something out. You're hungry, you're tired, and Ronon tells me you're injured. Just come here and everything will be al-"_

She ripped the earpiece out and stuffed it in one of her pockets, ignoring the way her heart was burning. Back to the quiet, to the low, low hum of a powered-down Atlantis.

**. . .**

"Hey, Lieutenant," Sheppard said brightly, watching as Cooper seated herself across from him.

"Evening, sir," she said, picking the roll off her tray. "I heard Lorne was in the infirmary. What's that about?"

"Major Lorne was hit with a Wraith stunner on his most recent mission," Teyla said. "He will be fine, but one of the doctors has told me the effects are lasting longer than usual."

"I think he's just tired," Sheppard said, but Cooper could see he was worried, if only slightly. A friend brought to their knees by the Wraith, in any way, was cause for the colonel to worry.

"What do we do if they get smarter?" she asked quietly.

"You mean smarter than they already are?"

"I must say, that is not something I would like to think about," Teyla said, shifting her perch on the table.

"It's a viable fear, though, right?" Cooper asked. "I'm not just overly paranoid?"

"The way I see it, we keep it simple," Ronon said. "Kill 'em."

"That was poetic, Ronon," Sheppard said.

Then a radio sitting on the table crackled. _"We need back up in the infirmary ASAP, Major Lorne has lost control."_

Sheppard was on his feet in an instant. "Let's go."

**. . .**

She checked her stunner. This one was better than the last, but thankfully not one of the new ones brought to the city. One of the guards at the door stirred and she gave him another jolt. She'd made sure to stun them just after the routine check-in. By the time anyone in the control center realized something was wrong, she'd be long gone. She gave the weapons room another once-over, then left.

Her pattern was starting to become a slightly comforting routine. Run, hide, find food, hide, find weapons, hide. All she had to do was stay out of sight of everyone else, which wasn't hard, with all the unoccupied places in Atlantis.

And, boy, had Atlantis saved her ass on several occasions. Cooper had been informed of the city's protocols to lock down if something was infecting its inhabitants. Due to the nature of the infection, Atlantis didn't know until too late that an automated lockdown was necessary. She tried to make up for it, however, by assisting the last unaffected person in any way possible. If Cooper needed a locked door open, she didn't even have to bypass the crystals. If one of the roaming guards was getting too close, they would find obstacles and have to change their route. Sometimes in the quiet moments, like now, when Cooper stopped to catch ten or fifteen minutes of rest, she could almost feel a conjoined sense of guilt. Perhaps that was an illusion, created by her overwhelming remorse at having to hurt so many of her friends, but she almost thought she could feel the city growing sadder by the day.

"It's alright," she said softly, her hand on the wall. "I'll fix this. I have to."


	3. Chapter 3

"_What_ is going on?" Elizabeth asked, pacing at the head of the briefing room.

"Doing our best to figure it out, ma'am," Cooper said, the tension in her voice echoing that of the room.

"I have a lot of men in lock up because we can't get a handle on them, I want answers."

"We're doing everything we can, Elizabeth, but with Carson on the mainland out of reach, it's been slow going," McKay said.

"I want long-distance communications back up. We need him here," she said.

"I've been trying, but the system won't let me fix it."

"We believe that Atlantis may be trying to stop us from making contact outside of the city to prevent any further spread of the illness," Teyla said, unconsciously wringing her hands.

"Well, too little too late. The lockdown procedures should have been started yesterday," Elizabeth said with slight annoyance.

"The nature of the illness might be what prevented the lockdown in the first place," McKay said. "It's not like one of them coughs and five of them get sick. It must be coming from the stunners Major Lorne's team took off the Wraith that ambushed them."

"You mean, biological warfare?" Cooper asked.

"Something like it. Wouldn't be the first time they've tried it."

Elizabeth sighed, slowly sitting down in one of the chairs. "Any word on Colonel Sheppard's location?"

The room grew quiet, everyone shifting uncomfortably. "No," Cooper said, knowing she had to deliver the hard news. "He knows this city well. It might be a while before we finally track him down."

"We'll find him," Ronon said firmly, speaking for the first time in an hour. "I can track him. I know how he works."

"Ronon, we talked about this," Elizabeth said firmly.

"I can get him," he insisted, palms down on the table. "If we can get him under control, this disease will stop spreading. Let me go into the lower levels to find him."

"And if he manages to infect you, too?" she shot back. "If you get under this influence, there may be no stopping it. I have no doubt you could take out the entire population of this city and I will not allow that. You stay _here_, and I'll send Lieutenant Cooper and Teyla to find him."

The Satedan snarled, but she held her ground. He gave her one last dirty look before storming out of the room. "He means well," Teyla assured the doctor quietly.

"Yes, and the road to hell is paved with good intentions," McKay said darkly. "Look, we need to get this under control, and the only way to do that is to reign Sheppard in. He's too dangerous lurking just out of our reach and he's infecting all the teams we send after him."

"Not a lot we can do about that, McKay," Cooper said, standing up and checking her sidearm. "We just won't let him stun us. Come on, Teyla, we'll take some old stunners. Try not to use bullets."

"You do not have to tell me," she said wearily, getting to her feet.

"Good luck, you two," Elizabeth said. "For all our sakes."

**. . .**

She thought maybe it had been close to a week since all this started, but it was hard to tell, being stuck in the underbelly of the city. Would the effects ever wear off naturally? She saw Major Lorne walking around once, and thought maybe that wasn't so. He was the first to be infected. If this thing wore off, she would know from him.

But no, he was just as violent and merciless as everyone else.

Her leg was bleeding now. Just a graze, but she was running low on bandages. She could steal more first aid kits, but at some point, she was going to need more than that. The main infirmary was full of unfriendlies and out of the question, but there were others, some of them abandoned because they couldn't be given power. She didn't need lights, she needed medicine.

For now, however, she was too tired to go find one. She ducked into a room that had yet to be surveyed by the scientists and curled up behind an Ancient device. Unless they could miraculously get the life signs detector back on (which wasn't exactly out of the question), she would be safe.

**. . .**

She had put her radio back in and was picking up some chatter. A jumper was headed towards the city, requesting that the doors be opened. Apparently it was only a single person in the craft, and not deemed very dangerous. Sheppard only sent two people to meet him.

Cooper packed up what little she carried with her and headed for the jumper bay. There was no telling if the person flying the jumper was already infected or not. She didn't know if Sheppard had sent the men to infect the newcomer or to greet him. She didn't even know who the pilot was. But if it was someone friendly... She'd do anything just to talk to someone at this point.

Two men? Someone had been lying, because four men stood at the entrance to the jumper bay. Sheppard knew she'd want to come see, and had prepared accordingly.

They noticed her almost the same time she noticed them and began firing. Again, real bullets. Word had been spread that she was not to be saved. She fired back, stunning one but still leaving three. Too many, for her current physical state.

"Where's the colonel?" she called from behind a set of crates. "Is he too scared to fight me now?"

"The colonel is occupied with other matters," one of the guards said.

"Really? He couldn't even spare five minutes to come see me?" Her chest was heaving. She was too tired, too hungry for this. "I'm just one girl, how much trouble could I be?"

One of them growled. Good, so she was pissing them off. She bobbed above the crates and fired twice, but got knicked on her shoulder. "How many left?" she called, her voice cracking.

"Five."

She rolled her eyes. There was nothing left for it; she couldn't leave now, and she couldn't get into the bay without taking out the guards. Sucking in a breath, she laid herself down on the floor and fired from the shadows. Both remaining guards went down. Slowly, she got to her feet and stumbled over, then took away their weapons. There was a bag slung over her shoulder that she'd been collecting the new stunners in. Only two of the guards actually had them, and few did. She didn't know how many there were, but it wasn't enough to arm the whole city.

She stepped fully into the jumper bay just as the returning jumper was landing. From her angle, she couldn't see the pilot, but kept her weapon raised, anyway. Then the lights turned off and she was plunged into darkness once again.

"Good lord, it's a wee bit dim in here, isn't it?"

Her heart leaped into her throat. "Carson?" she whispered.

A figure stepped out from behind the jumper, and through the gloom she could make out the familiar face. "Aye," he said slowly, raising his hands. "And who's the one pointing a gun at me, then?"

She lowered the weapon, one hand going to her mouth as tears sprang to her eyes. "Thank you," she whispered to whoever was responsible for sending this blessing.

"Lieutenant Cooper?" he said, stepping forward a few paces. "Good lord, what's happened here?"

She didn't answer, couldn't, through her tears. She just hugged him tightly. Of all the people that could have remained sane, he was the best to have.

"It's alright, love, come on. Oh, you're hurt."

She nodded, pulling away and wiping her cheeks. "Yeah. Come on, it's not safe in here, we need to go."


	4. Chapter 4

"How long have you been on your own like this?" Beckett asked as she led him to the secondary infirmary.

"Few days," she said. "Feels like it's been a month."

He sighed. "I'm sorry, I was away on the mainland. A few of the Athosians were sick, so I was taking care of them for a few days. I thought something was odd when I radio'd Weir and didn't hear back."

"Communications have been mostly down since the situation got really bad. I cut most of the power a few days ago," she told him.

"If you cut the power, how did the bay doors open?"

She shrugged. "Not all of the power is out. I've noticed that Atlantis has been redirecting some of it to help me out a little."

He raised his eyebrows. "That's very impressive, to have the whole city on your side like that."

She merely nodded, then ushered him into a room half stocked with medical supplies. "I found this yesterday. It's been my safehouse, basically. They shouldn't find us here."

"Alright, then. Let me have a look at that arm and you can tell me how all this started." He set down his medical bag, rummaging through its contents as she pulled herself up onto the examination table.

"Major Lorne's team was attacked by a group of Wraith about a week ago. He was stunned and sent to the infirmary, but while he was there, he regained consciousness and lost control. Started fighting everybody. They put him in isolation, but more cases kept occurring. By the time we finally stopped all off-world activity, it was too late. Too many people were affected, and the number kept growing because of those." She gestured to the bag of stunners on the floor. "They're new, a different make from the ones we've been collecting. Teams would take the stunners off dead Wraith like we normally do, and bring them back here. The ones affected sought them out and began using them on everyone else."

"If they were in isolation, how did it manage to spread to the whole city?" Beckett asked. He looked back at her arm, now free of gauze, and frowned. "Who gave this to you?"

She tried not to wince. "Ronon."

His eyes snapped up, then he began looking over her body in earnest. "You've got bruises around your collar bone. Did someone try to strangle you?"

She swallowed. "I had a few run-ins with Sheppard," she said quietly, as though saying it loudly made it more real.

His mouth was set in a firm line. "You'd best get on with the telling of that story."

"The reason everyone else got affected was largely because of Sheppard. He... Well, you know the colonel. He's always the first response. Went down to corral a group of Marines who'd gotten out of hand and... one of them got lucky. And then we lost him." She winced as Beckett poured disinfectant on her arm, but tried to block the pain and continued. "He hid in the lower levels, and half our equipment stopped working, so he must have gotten to something important. We couldn't pinpoint his location, and no search teams came back the same as they were before. Weir finally sent Teyla and I down, but refused to send Ronon because if he was lost, he'd take everyone else with him."

"I'm surprised he listened," Beckett said.

"He didn't," she replied through gritted teeth. "We were down there for a couple hours when he showed up. We told him to go back, but it was little use. His mind was made up. We encountered Colonel Sheppard, and he got both of them. The only reason I made it out is because I got into a transporter before he could get to me. After that... it was only a matter of time before everyone else went down, too. I broke into the control room early on, just after McKay got communications back online. I gave direction to the Daedalus and SGC to not come anywhere near here until further notice. Then I cut the power, and now we're here."

He looked at her sadly, shaking his head. "You shouldn't have been left alone like that."

"It's not like it was anybody's choice."

"No, it wasn't. But still, I'm boilin' just thinking of what's been going on here." He sighed, and she could see the anger burning underneath. Such a good man, such a gentle soul. "Have you had anymore contact with the others."

"Aside from violent encounters? No. Sheppard tries to talk to me on the radio sometimes, but I don't talk back." She bit her lip, feeling the overwhelming sense of relief wash over her again. "I'm just really glad you're here." Her voice was breaking. Oh, god, she was going to cry again.

"That's right, I'm here now," he said soothingly, wiping a stray tear away. "You're going to be alright. I promise."

She nodded, then suddenly the world went black.

**. . .**

She woke up with a start, realizing she'd been asleep far too long but still feeling so _exhausted_. "What happened?" she asked, raising her head slightly.

Beckett, seated at a make-shift desk with a lamp shining on him, turned to look at her. "You collapsed from exhaustion, hunger, blood loss, pain... take your pick. Developed a fever not too long after, but I managed to get it under control." He stood up and walked over to her, his tablet in his hand. "When this is all over, we're going to need to put you on vitamin supplements."

She groaned softly. "Maybe I'd just rather they killed me."

"Don't be ridiculous. You're no good to anyone dead, and they won't kill you anyway. You told me they're just converting everyone."

She frowned, looking at her hands. "Yeah, well, they've decided I'm not worth the trouble."

There was a pause, then, "Oh."

"You should expect the same treatment, Doctor," she said. "You're one of the only people that could possibly reverse this. They're not going to treat you kindly."

"No, you're right," he agreed. "I've already taken the liberty of studying those stunners you took. I've looked at Wraith weapons before, and these have definitely been modified. The technology is a wee bit out of my league, though. This would be a lot easier if Rodney were here."

She tried not to get too angry. "Rodney's not here. He's trying to get the power running again, but good luck to him, because I've taken all the necessary pieces and hidden them."

Beckett frowned. "Right. Well, while you recover, I'll keep looking into this and see if I can find a cure."

"I'm fine now," she said, attempting to sit up.

He put his hand on her chest before she could get very far. "You're a long way from fine, missy. Now, until _I _see fit, you're going to stay there and let me take care of you. No more trying to take your health into your own hands. I saw how you tried to patch yourself up, so don't even think about arguing with me."

She sank back into the pillows, watching him go back to his desk with some amount of annoyance. "So you just want me to lay around?"

"Not much for you to really do, is there?"

"But what if we're attacked? I need to be ready, not sleeping," she argued.

He turned to look at her. "You said this room was safe."

"No, don't take me at my word. We have _no_ idea when someone will find us."

He shook his head. "The door's locked, love. I stepped out for a moment to check the hallway, and when I came back in, I heard it. The city must really have hope for you."

She paused, then reached up to brush a hand along the wall. "That's my girl," she murmured.


	5. Chapter 5

For the next several days, maybe a week, Beckett continued to toy with the stunners and Cooper recovered from her wounds. They were left alone down there, and Cooper doubted anyone would guess that's where they were. If Beckett needed any small piece of equipment, anything she was able to carry, he had to approve her leaving before she went to steal it for him. He'd taken up a mother hen role since arriving, and was taking that job very seriously. She appreciated it, but was starting to think more and more that they couldn't stay down there forever. At some point, they would need to do something.

"It's been too quiet," she said upon returning to the doctor after retrieving another data pad.

"Aye. And you're complaining?"

"I am," she said firmly. "There's a good chance that McKay will find a new way to get the power back online. He's pulled stuff out of his ass before, why should now be any different?"

"Because that's not Rodney," Beckett said. "He thinks differently. These people behave like Wraith. If he no longer has that drive to preserve as many lives as he can, then it'll take him far longer to come up with a solution."

She shook her head, turning away. "That's not good enough for me. I want to _do_ something."

He sighed, rubbing his forehead. "Fine. Then here's your chance."

She turned back, surprised. "What?"

He didn't look happy with himself in the slightest. "I need a human subject, someone who's already been affected. Obviously it would be a terrible decision to shoot either of us with the stunners, so you'll have to go kidnap someone."

She frowned, crossing her arms. "You really think we can do that?"

"We'll have to tie them to the bed. The stunners don't make anyone stronger, just more aggressive."

"What did the Wraith have to gain from this, anyway?"

"Well, that's something I've been thinking a lot about," he said. "Perhaps, if they have Wraith-like personalities, the people affected won't attack the Wraith. They only turn against other humans. Essentially, they're making their own brand of food that won't fight them."

"Not if I can help it," she said, grabbing her tac vest. "I'll go get your test subject. Don't wait up."

"On the contrary. You'd better be back by dinner, young lady."

She flashed him a quick smile on her way out the door. "I'll be back."

**. . .**

This wouldn't take long. All she had to do was find a couple of guards, stun them, and drag one back to the infirmary. She wouldn't even need to go far, anyone would do. So long as it wasn't Sheppard, Ronon, or Teyla, because any of them would be resourceful enough to break free of Beckett's restraints.

She made it maybe two hallways before she stopped. The back of her neck prickled, her hand tightened on her gun. No one was visibly present, but that meant nothing. _They know_, she thought, a jolt of panic going through her.

From the darkness came the sound of gunfire. She dove to the side, hiding beneath a flight of stairs as hunched figures emerged from their hiding places. They knew. Somehow, they'd known exactly where she was going to be and had waited to ambush her. Maybe Rodney _had_ managed to get a few systems back online. _It's not your fault_, she thought, a silent message to the city.

Military training was the only thing keeping her grounded now. She fired back through the spaces between steps, holding her position even when bullets pinged off the metal. A few went down, but she was counting at least ten men. She couldn't do this, and they knew it.

If she'd learned anything from Rodney, it was that sometimes a strategic retreat was completely necessary. Giving up her life now would be pointless and might endanger Beckett. She felt no shame in turning and running.

She hauled herself up and sprinted up the stairs, returning fire behind her as she ran. This was the safest route, as it was the only place that wasn't blocked and offered a second flight of stairs as partial cover. She made it to the next level, but the guards weren't far behind. Now she was entering enemy territory, places crowded with unfriendlies. She wouldn't make it far.

Another set of guards, only a few this time, blocked the way to the next flight of stairs. She turned sharply, skidding on the floor and twisting her ankle. Gunfire rang in her ears, making her deaf to the shouts following her escape. There was a dead end up ahead, she knew. No more hallways after this one. If death was to follow, Atlantis was as good a place to die as any.

But maybe the end was not quite so dead. It was a balcony, one of the places in the back corners of this floor that overlooked the ocean. Jumping offered more of a chance of survival than staying and getting shot, but she still found herself hesitating before launching over the side.

"Colonel Sheppard says to spare you if you join us," called one of the soldiers, raising a hand to halt the others.

Cooper looked between him and the water. They were almost equally dangerous...

"You tell the colonel he can court martial me later," she said, grabbing the railing and leaping over, down to the water far below.


	6. Chapter 6

She had been gone far too long.

It had been an hour and Beckett still hadn't seen hide nor hair of the lieutenant. If she was in trouble, it was his duty to help.

She'd left a stunner for him, one of the regular ones. He grimly donned his tac vest (which he'd luckily had with him when returning from the mainland) and hefted the gun. At least he didn't have to kill anyone, but he wasn't anxious to see firsthand the effects of the new stunners.

The first couple hallways were quiet. He was hoping, a little desperately, that he might meet Cooper as she was coming back with her "catch," but no such thing happened. His heart was hammering. She'd survived this apocalyptic scenario too long to get caught. Following his direction, no less. If she was hurt because of him... He didn't want to think of that.

But something _had_ happened to her. After about ten or fifteen minutes of walking, he encountered the unconscious bodies of three guards. Dents and skid marks around the hall were proof of a fight, with quite a lot of fire power, no less. But he didn't see any blood, so that was a good sign.

It would be folly for him to go after her. He wasn't a fighter, and there were too many people in the upper levels that were ready to kill him. He didn't even have a clue as to where she might be. The best way to help her now was to find a cure.

Gripping the tac vest of the closest body, he began slowly making his way back to the secondary infirmary. After a moment, he realized he recognized the face. The dark hair, the heavy brow.

Major Lorne.

**. . .**

Evan Lorne had always been such a polite lad. This Wraith technology had made his personality almost unrecognizable.

"Let me out of here," he snarled, straining against the restraints. "I swear to God, I will bring every soldier in this city down on your ass!"

"That doesn't sound very comfortable," Beckett said dryly, filling a syringe with clear liquid. "Be a dear and hold your arm straight, would you?"

"You touch me, and you're dead."

"I'd believe you if you weren't strapped to a table." He injected the serum into the major's arm, gripping the man by the shoulder to keep him still. "You're sick, Major. I'm trying to make you better."

"Sick?" Lorne gave a short, harsh laugh. "Do you have any idea how freeing this is? All the people I want to smack around, I don't have to hold back. I could kill a man and not feel bad about it."

This sort of talk was turning the doctor's stomach. "And if the Wraith show up? What then?"

"They'll welcome us. We're finally _equals_."

Beckett sighed. He was beginning to think his original theory was right. All the affected people would walk right into the Wraith's arms, thinking they'd be welcomed. They'd have no idea what would happen. If the Wraith ever found Atlantis... He didn't want to be there when that happened.

"How do you feel now?" Beckett asked, scrutinizing the major.

Slowly, the light of rage faded from Lorne's eyes. He looked around blankly. "Dr. Beckett? What's going on?"

Beckett was stunned. It was close to impossible for him to get this right on the first try. But, there was the major, seeming totally fine.

"You touched me, didn't you?" Lorne suddenly hissed, face contorting to show fury. "I told you, I'd kill you if you touched me!"

He sighed. It was going to be a long night.


	7. Chapter 7

Cooper was shoved to her knees, soaking wet, on the floor of the Gate room. She was shivering and stripped of her tac vest, and there were fifty guns pointed at her head. Sheppard stood at the bottom of the steps, smiling coldly at her.

When she'd jumped into the water, she hadn't really thought about how much _ocean_ there was. It went on so far she couldn't even see the mainland. Her best hope had been to swim to the city and sneak back inside. Unfortunately, she'd been half-frozen and weak by the time she reached metal, easy pickings for the teams awaiting her arrival. She'd been hauled out of the water and dragged inside, where Sheppard wanted to deal with her personally.

"Almost gave me a heart attack, Cooper," he said, stepping towards her. "Thought you swam out to sea. You didn't think you'd survive out there, did you?"

She said nothing, trembling in silence. Beads of water dripped from her nose onto the floor, making a soft _pat, pat_. She tried not to think that was what her blood would be doing soon.

"Listen up, Lieutenant - you've been pissing me off a little too long now, and I'm not happy. It would have been better for you if you'd just surrendered to begin with, but now I'm mad. Now, I'm not gonna offer any mercy."

"Just shoot me," she ground out.

"Shoot you?" He knelt in front of her, shoving his face in hers. "After all you've done? That's the _easy_ way out, Cooper, the _coward's_ way out. I expected more from you."

Coward. She would have laughed, if she wasn't shivering so hard. He had a lot of nerve calling _her_ a coward. "Says the man that hid from me as much as I hid from him."

"You thought I was hiding? Pathetic. You can barely survive a revolution with a hundred people at your back. Forgive me if I wasn't expecting you to survive _this_ by yourself."

She clenched her jaw, reverting back to silence. He had Sheppard's face, but her colonel would never speak to her like this.

"But now I've got a plan for you, so we can all move on with our lives. Most of us, anyway." He stood and strode to where Ronon was standing, patting the man's shoulder. "Ronon here hasn't had the chance for a good fight in a while. Call it one-sided, but I think this fight will turn out in my favor."

She closed her eyes, heart sinking. "Isn't that a lot of effort?" she asked petulantly.

His eyes narrowed. "Maybe. But this is a lot more fun to watch. So we're gonna set you loose-"

One of the soldiers cried out in pain and fell to the floor. Sheppard whipped around, searching for the culprit. "What the hell was that?"

Two more men collapsed, then another two moments later. The soldiers pointing guns at Cooper looked in confusion at their leader, wondering whether to keep their aim on her or find the attackers. In the short minutes that it took for Sheppard to gather himself, five more men fell. He stormed up to her as the soldiers clustered together, facing outward and firing blindly. "What is this?" he snapped, seizing her by the collar.

She wouldn't tell him, but she knew. She'd seen Beckett and Lorne behind a corner, darting out for just a moment to shoot. He must have found a cure, and from the number of shots, she was thinking he'd converted more than just the major. The fierce pride brought a smile to her face. "You're in trouble, sir."

He snarled and turned around, still holding on to her. "Move aside," he shouted at the soldiers by the stairs. They provided cover for him, shooting back every time some hidden person fired. More men kept falling, but now some of them were waking up. There was mass confusion as the freshly conscious soldiers gathered themselves, sensing the danger and either moving away or attacking. But they weren't attacking Beckett and Lorne. They were attacking the people shooting at them.

Sheppard dragged her to the control room, which was currently devoid of people. He pressed her against the railing, holding his gun to her head. "Hold your fire or I shoot!"

Since no one knew who he was addressing, everyone stopped. He stared at them all, chest heaving with anger. "I'm gonna kill her if you don't show yourselves right - argh!"

Cooper elbowed him sharply in the ribs. She'd sparred with him too many times to not know how he fought at this point.

The fight below resumed, but they had no effect on the lieutenant and the colonel. He slammed her into a table, knocking over monitors, and she caught her foot up around his leg, knocking him off balance. As she moved out of the way, his fist connected with her jaw, causing her to stumble. She could taste blood.

"You just don't quit, do you?" he snapped when they broke apart.

"You taught me not to," she grunted, aiming a kick at his side.

On they fought. It was a veritable battle royale in the Gate room, an ugly sight, but thankfully not very bloody. Most of the blood was coming from the two in the control room. Their attacks were so violent and intense that it was possible both opponents had broken or fractured bones. Cooper did her best, but she was well aware that if she was going to win this, she needed a weapon.

With a well-placed hand and foot attack, she pinned Sheppard against the wall, slamming his head on the metal. When he paused to stop the stars appearing before his eyes, she ran to the railing. "Carson!" she shouted at the top of her lungs.

It wasn't Beckett, but Lorne who responded. He threw a stunner to her waiting hands, and she whipped around to fire at Sheppard just as he was coming to attack. He stopped in his tracks and collapsed to the floor.

She waited for a long moment, staring at Sheppard's body. He might have been faking. She wouldn't put it past him, this Sheppard was insane. But she had seen the stunner take effect, watched the light spread over his chest. She had to let herself accept that it was probably over. Slowly, she slid to the floor, thinking maybe she might not get up again.


	8. Chapter 8

Colonel Sheppard awoke to many voices and lots of beeping. He opened his eyes, then squinted against the lights of the infirmary. _What...?_

"Beckett," he grunted, but his throat felt rough and the sound was weak. He tried again. "Beckett?"

The doctor turned at his name and his eyes finally landed on the colonel. They were tired eyes, a look that was familiar to Sheppard. Beckett had been up working for hours, probably days.

"Colonel Sheppard," he said, going to the man's bedside. "How do you feel?"

"Like I got hit by a train," he said. "What's going on? It looks busy in here."

Beckett swallowed. "You mean you don't - You don't remember anything?"

"Well, I remember Lorne giving me a solid right hook, and then-" He froze. He remembered getting hit with a stunner. And then... and then...

Oh, God, and _then_.

His eyes widened, horror descending on him. "No..."

"Don't frighten yourself, Colonel," Beckett said quickly, glancing nervously at Sheppard's heart monitor. "It's alright now, we've fixed the problem."

_Fixed the problem_. Like it was a leaky faucet and not a mind-control outbreak. "Cooper," he said tightly. "Where is she?"

The doctor sighed heavily. "She's fine, Colonel, but I need you to-"

"Doc, you don't understand," he said fiercely, grabbing Beckett's sleeve. He saw the man flinch and felt another wave of nauseating guilt. "I... I almost... Look, I need to talk to her, alright? She needs me to talk to her."

But a second later, he didn't need the answer. He spotted her, standing in a corner of the infirmary and keeping out of everyone's way. She was hugging herself, staring at all the people and looking white as a sheet. He needed to go to her.

"Colonel, _please_, stay in your bed-"

"Go help somebody else," he growled, clinging to his IV stand as he shuffled over to Cooper. He approached slowly, with no idea of what he'd even say to her. What _could_ he say? He'd nearly killed her about eight times over the past couple of weeks. He was shocked that she was here at all and not still hiding. "Cooper-"

It was a mistake to put a hand on her shoulder, in hindsight.

She whipped around, a knife in her hand pointed at his heart. He stopped, and so did half the people in the infirmary. It only took her a second to realize this was _bad_ and unnecessary, and she put the blade away. "Sorry," she breathed, not meeting his eyes.

"You okay?" he asked, looking her up and down. She was bruised and battered, with several bandages on her body, but she was still standing. "You looked like you were about to hyperventilate."

Again, looking everywhere _but_ at him. "I'm just... not used to being in a room full of people. Not - not after-" She shook her head. "I have to go." She breezed past him out the door. He couldn't cope with how much this _hurt_. He'd said two sentences to her and that was already too much.

"She needs time, Colonel," Beckett said at his side. "You don't expect her to welcome you back with open arms, do you? It's been a bloody hard two weeks for her, and I think everyone should just leave her alone for a while."

Sheppard continued staring at the door, but allowed the doctor to lead him back to his bed. He couldn't talk to Cooper, but Beckett seemed willing to stand his presence. "Listen," he said, a note of urgency in his tone. "Whatever I did to you - whatever I said... I'm _sorry_."

Beckett put a hand on his arm. "I know, Colonel. Get some rest. Cooper really did a number on you, but you should be alright in a couple of days."

He nodded, but silently disagreed. _Alright_ was sort of a relative term, after all.

**. . .**

"I can't even begin to thank you for all you did," Elizabeth said earnestly. She had called a meeting in her office, just Ronon, Teyla, Sheppard, McKay, Beckett, and Cooper. The lieutenant appreciated the small party, still unwilling to immerse herself in the crowd, but was a little miffed that Dr. Weir had gathered the people she'd been most avoiding the past several weeks. "Colonel Caldwell contacted me this afternoon, as well as General Landry, and they both told me that at the worst of the crisis, you commanded them to cut contact with Atlantis until further notice. Now, I know some people in your situation would have called in back-up, but under the circumstances, that would have made matters worse. You were attacked again and again, yet no one died in this event. You repeatedly risked yourself for the sake of the city and the people in it, even when all was against you."

"Just did what I had to do," Cooper said quietly. "Beckett did the heavy-lifting."

"Oh, don't even start," said the doctor. "All I did was manipulate some of the stunners."

"Regardless, Atlantis is in great debt to you both," Elizabeth said. "Now, Lieutenant, if I could promote you here and now, I would, but there are measures that have to be taken. For now, I grant you both two weeks leave of absence. And whatever you need, I'll do my best to see that you get it."

"Thank you, Dr. Weir," Beckett said with a smile and a nod.

Cooper said nothing for a moment, her arms crossed as she stared at a point on the floor. Finally, she gathered herself and looked up. "Thank you. I'd like to request that my time be spent back on Earth, with my family."

Elizabeth nodded. "We assumed that might be the direction you'd want to take. The SGC is ready to welcome you both on the other side, should you want it."

"We'll be ready for you when you get back," Sheppard promised. "Your spot on the team will remain until you're ready to go back to work."

She nodded, still not meeting his eyes. "Thank you. If you don't mind, I'd like to go back to my quarters now."

Elizabeth nodded. "Of course. And thank you, again. I don't want to think about what would have happened if you hadn't held on."

And that moment, those words, were like a ray of sunlight breaking through the dark cloud over Cooper's head. She'd been wondering, ever since she realized she was alone, if any of this was worth it. All the pain, the emotional trauma, the resulting months or years of psychological damage - was it worth all of that? She could have given in at any time, let them change her, or, better, kill her.

But she'd held on. Why? Because Atlantis needed her. Because everyone needed her. And if she could save people, make it so that Atlantis could be home once again, well... wasn't that worth anything she could go through?

She smiled slightly and shook Elizabeth's hand. "I'd do it again," she said, voice stronger than it had been in days.


End file.
